By Nadine Kam

Nadine Kam photo
Valerie Ragaza-Miao, who’ll be competing as Mrs. Honolulu in the Mrs. Hawaii USA pageant on May 23, draws numbers for dozens of prizes during an advance screening of “Confessions of a Shopaholic” last Thursday at the Consolidated Theatres, Ward Entertainment Center.

As expected, “Confessions of a Shopaholic” offered lots of eye candy, and I’m not just talking clothes. Actor Hugh Dancy was also great to look at, and after catching a preview with my friends we all agreed later that his character was the equivalent of the perfect man: smart, good looking, nice smile, ambitious, rich but not snobby, confident enough to ignore the notion of the obvious trophy girlfriend/wife, understands fashion but again, not snobby or obsessed about it.

Dream shopping from the movie.

Mr. Dancy

Sigh. If you fit the bill, I know at least a dozen women who would love to meet you! You don’t even have to be rich. Money is just the icing on top of all other fine traits.

The preview was also a party for friends and fans of Valerie Joseph’s Valerie Ragaza Miao, who, before the film began, offered dozens of door prizes for those who made Foodbank donations. Some, who didn’t know about the drive, wrote checks on the spot.

In spite of the frivolity at the film’s surface, it offers a starting point to talk about the intersection of desire and ability to pay. The National Endowment of Financial Education has a site Spendster.org that lets visitors confess their own shopaholic tendencies, believing the admissions actually do help people face their weaknesses.

You may have a problem if you have a tendency to:
>> Buy things you want without thinking about whether you can afford them at the moment.
>> Buy things often to cheer yourself up or reward yourself.
>> Struggle paying your bills because you always seem to be living on the financial edge.
>> Tend to keep buying more of your favorite things even if you don’t have a specific need for them.
>> Feel intensely deprived, angry or upset if you have to put off buying something you really want.
>> Turn excessively to credit cards to buy wanted items.

Here are some suggested cures from Spendster:

>> DO prioritize: Often, we fall prey to retailer’s persuasive displays and instead of buying only what we need, we end up with a cart full of all kinds of other stuff. Before you head out to the store, make a list and keep to it.
>> DON’T remove the tags: They’re itchy and scratchy and poke you in weird places, but resist the urge to rip off the tags until you’re sure you are going to keep the item.
>> DO wait 30 minutes before making a purchase. Sometimes if you leave it, you might not want to go back to buy it.
>> DON’T make it easy: Take only the cash you need for the day. Leave your credit cards at home and freeze them if you must. Tell a friend about your situation and empower him or her to tell you “no” when you feel the urge to spend needlessly.
>> DO return it: If it’s a recent offense, dig out your receipt (tip: keep all receipts in a designated pocket of your purse or checkbook for easy recovery) and head straight back to the store. If you feel that you’re unable to return to the “scene of the crime” without either spending more or exchanging for a lower-priced item, ask a spouse or friend to run the errand for you.
>> DON’T pretend it never happened. Denial is a powerful tool, but admitting your spending mistakes allows you the insight to not repeat them. Visit a Web site like Spendster.org for some cathartic reflection. While you’re there, learn from other people that have posted their splurges.
>> DO look to prevent future binges. Plenty of nonprofit organizations have been established to help consumers get a better grip of their finances and budgeting.

Get more advice at www.SmartAboutMoney.org with a search for “compulsive shopping.”

This entry was posted on Monday, February 16th, 2009 at 2:54 pm and is filed under Recessionista, Lifestyle, Film, Obsessions. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.